Here are some pictures from the week end.
Stinx looking sooooo mischevious
In the leaves
Walking with Grandma Fi Fi
Some family pics.
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Fall Pictures
Stinx looking sooooo mischevious Walking with Grandma Fi Fi
EBF
I've been wanting to write about this lately but haven't had the time. Now that Stinx is napping at the moment I will share some of the things I've been thinking about lately.
Back when Stinx still lived in my uterus, I thought I'd give breastfeeding a try. I was pretty determined but still thought if it didn't work out it wouldn't be a big deal. Turns out - Breastfeeding was one of the things that actually went as I hoped. I knew close friends who nursed their children over 1 year and thought "hey, if it works for them, fine but I don't think I'll be doing that, or if I do, it won't be in public". That was basically my thoughts on EBF (extended breastfeeding). Well, its funny how opinions change once you have your own baby.
For some, before the baby is born they swear they'd never co-sleep. What happens? They start the family bed.
Or some say they won't let their children use pacifiers. What happens? Their child is 2 years old and still uses a "paci".
Some say they wouldn't let their child drag their ratty tatty lovie around everywhere they go. What happens? Their child has the lovie at the grocery store.
Some say they'd never let their child eat McDonalds. What happens? Their kid eats McDonalds.
That's just what happens! Why? Because before you have your baby or before your put in that dilemma, you just have no clue!! NO CLUE!!!!!
Just as I have NO CLUE about what my future parenting will look like. I mean, sure, I have a little guess at how I want to parent, but really, I don't know what my parenting will look like in 2 years, 5 years or 10 years.
So back to my point! All of us, that includes me, say we'll do or won't do things a certain way. And of course that changes once baby comes along. And okay, I will admit that sure, some people will stick to their original plan, even though they feel it might be wrong. They don't want to be hypocrites. Or maybe some people just feel that their original plan works for their baby. (I'd be really surprised if that happens!).
So back to the topic. I told hubby back when Stinx was younger that I'd nurse him until he was walking and talking. Well since I decided that, I changed my mind that my goal would be to nurse Stinx until he was 18 months. And since Stinx doesn't really talk yet I guess that was OK with Dad. Now, I didn't say I would wean him at 18 months, I said it was my goal to continue nursing. I did say that I would try to start the gradual weaning process at 18 months.
Stinx is now 19 months. He still nurses the same amount as 18 months. Mind you, he is not dependant on nursing for bedtime so in away we are making progress. I just don't feel the need to cut him off. Why should I?
Breastfeeding should be a mutual agreement between a mother and child. As long as both are content with the arrangement, so be it. I don't mind nursing Stinx. And he certainly still wants to. So, so be it.
If I get to a point where I don't want to nurse him anymore, I will take a more pro-active stance. But for now, I am quite fine with using the "Don't offer, Don't refuse" approach to weaning.
Of course, for me, the ideal way for Stinx to wean would be fully self-led. Just gradually stops asking to nurse over a course of time. Will it happen that way? I don't know. That will depend on a few things.
I was in a bit of a fit for the last while thinking I needed to wean Stinx being trying to conceive (TTC). A friend had mentioned that her sister had miscarried because she was EBF'ing and had a high metabolism. I don't think my friend was trying to scare me, just warn me I guess. But it did scare me a bit. I don't know how I would handle a miscarriage. That is such a tough thing to go through. However, after talking to my friend again about this, she mentioned her sister was super underweight, didn't eat well, and was vegetarian. My friend thought she wasn't getting enough protein. Who knows.
But I have done the research now. And I have several friends who did conceive while EBF'ing. It is safe to TTC or be pregnant while breastfeeding as long as you don't have a history of miscarriage, or are malnourished, or are put on bed rest. As long as you are eating well and have enough calories, it's pretty harmless. That was a huge stress relief for me. HUGE. Now I don't feel like I HAVE to wean Stinx before TTC or while I am pregnant.
Now, and here's one of those "I would never" moments, I really don't think I'd be into the whole tandem nursing thing. So if I were to conceive while nursing Stinx, I would wean him by 7 or 8 months pregnant. But hopefully he would wean on his own once the milk changes.
I've also been weighing the pro's and con's. I won't list them all but the only con's I could really think of were 1. What people would think of me EBF'ing 2. Stinx asking to nurse in front of people
Well as for #1, I have nursed Stinx to 19 months already - so I am already dealing with people's opinions. Will it really change much? Once you nurse a baby over 1, people start judging. So why should I care now that he is 19 months? This is a poor reason to wean a child.
#2. Stinx does do this occasionally. It's usually when he's hungry, thirsty or tired. It just means I have to offer him lots of food and be on the ball. He generally only does this when we are at home anyway. And since I haven't nursed Stinx publicly since he was about 1, I don't need to worry about this too much. Stinx pretty much knows we only nurse at home.
Here are some of my pro's:
1. Nursing while teething is AWESOME!!! No better way to settle a super cranky toddler. It must make his gums feel so much better. And it's the comfort. Which is another pro:
2. Comfort! You see kids with pacifiers, bottles, lovies out in public? Well, Stinx nurses for comfort in the privacy of our home.
3. Nap time. Stinx nurses before his nap if we're at home. It has made my life soooo much simpler since he started to nurse to sleep at nap time. SO MUCH SIMPLER. I was such a stress case before. I don't think I no longer deserve the title "Nap Nazi".
4. Its great way to cuddle/bond with an really active toddler.
So I don't think weaning will happen anytime soon. And that's OK for now. And its OK that I don't care about what people think of me and my child. Because ya know what? I don't judge the moms at the mall with their 2.5 yr old drinking out of a bottle, or the mom of a toddler with a paci at the play date, or the mom with the toddler at the grocery store with her lovie doll. I don't! Because those are things the child needs for comfort. And it's OK!! IT"S OK!! And so it's OK for my son to nurse in the privacy of my home. And, it's OK for a toddler to nurse in public! It shouldn't be weird to people.
So yeah - Go on Mom's! Do what you need to do! And don't care what other people think. You are just responding to your child's need as best you can. Right?
PS - I also want to add that because I am EBF'ing does not make me a breastfeeding Nazi.. ok?
Back when Stinx still lived in my uterus, I thought I'd give breastfeeding a try. I was pretty determined but still thought if it didn't work out it wouldn't be a big deal. Turns out - Breastfeeding was one of the things that actually went as I hoped. I knew close friends who nursed their children over 1 year and thought "hey, if it works for them, fine but I don't think I'll be doing that, or if I do, it won't be in public". That was basically my thoughts on EBF (extended breastfeeding). Well, its funny how opinions change once you have your own baby.
For some, before the baby is born they swear they'd never co-sleep. What happens? They start the family bed.
Or some say they won't let their children use pacifiers. What happens? Their child is 2 years old and still uses a "paci".
Some say they wouldn't let their child drag their ratty tatty lovie around everywhere they go. What happens? Their child has the lovie at the grocery store.
Some say they'd never let their child eat McDonalds. What happens? Their kid eats McDonalds.
That's just what happens! Why? Because before you have your baby or before your put in that dilemma, you just have no clue!! NO CLUE!!!!!
Just as I have NO CLUE about what my future parenting will look like. I mean, sure, I have a little guess at how I want to parent, but really, I don't know what my parenting will look like in 2 years, 5 years or 10 years.
So back to my point! All of us, that includes me, say we'll do or won't do things a certain way. And of course that changes once baby comes along. And okay, I will admit that sure, some people will stick to their original plan, even though they feel it might be wrong. They don't want to be hypocrites. Or maybe some people just feel that their original plan works for their baby. (I'd be really surprised if that happens!).
So back to the topic. I told hubby back when Stinx was younger that I'd nurse him until he was walking and talking. Well since I decided that, I changed my mind that my goal would be to nurse Stinx until he was 18 months. And since Stinx doesn't really talk yet I guess that was OK with Dad. Now, I didn't say I would wean him at 18 months, I said it was my goal to continue nursing. I did say that I would try to start the gradual weaning process at 18 months.
Stinx is now 19 months. He still nurses the same amount as 18 months. Mind you, he is not dependant on nursing for bedtime so in away we are making progress. I just don't feel the need to cut him off. Why should I?
Breastfeeding should be a mutual agreement between a mother and child. As long as both are content with the arrangement, so be it. I don't mind nursing Stinx. And he certainly still wants to. So, so be it.
If I get to a point where I don't want to nurse him anymore, I will take a more pro-active stance. But for now, I am quite fine with using the "Don't offer, Don't refuse" approach to weaning.
Of course, for me, the ideal way for Stinx to wean would be fully self-led. Just gradually stops asking to nurse over a course of time. Will it happen that way? I don't know. That will depend on a few things.
I was in a bit of a fit for the last while thinking I needed to wean Stinx being trying to conceive (TTC). A friend had mentioned that her sister had miscarried because she was EBF'ing and had a high metabolism. I don't think my friend was trying to scare me, just warn me I guess. But it did scare me a bit. I don't know how I would handle a miscarriage. That is such a tough thing to go through. However, after talking to my friend again about this, she mentioned her sister was super underweight, didn't eat well, and was vegetarian. My friend thought she wasn't getting enough protein. Who knows.
But I have done the research now. And I have several friends who did conceive while EBF'ing. It is safe to TTC or be pregnant while breastfeeding as long as you don't have a history of miscarriage, or are malnourished, or are put on bed rest. As long as you are eating well and have enough calories, it's pretty harmless. That was a huge stress relief for me. HUGE. Now I don't feel like I HAVE to wean Stinx before TTC or while I am pregnant.
Now, and here's one of those "I would never" moments, I really don't think I'd be into the whole tandem nursing thing. So if I were to conceive while nursing Stinx, I would wean him by 7 or 8 months pregnant. But hopefully he would wean on his own once the milk changes.
I've also been weighing the pro's and con's. I won't list them all but the only con's I could really think of were 1. What people would think of me EBF'ing 2. Stinx asking to nurse in front of people
Well as for #1, I have nursed Stinx to 19 months already - so I am already dealing with people's opinions. Will it really change much? Once you nurse a baby over 1, people start judging. So why should I care now that he is 19 months? This is a poor reason to wean a child.
#2. Stinx does do this occasionally. It's usually when he's hungry, thirsty or tired. It just means I have to offer him lots of food and be on the ball. He generally only does this when we are at home anyway. And since I haven't nursed Stinx publicly since he was about 1, I don't need to worry about this too much. Stinx pretty much knows we only nurse at home.
Here are some of my pro's:
1. Nursing while teething is AWESOME!!! No better way to settle a super cranky toddler. It must make his gums feel so much better. And it's the comfort. Which is another pro:
2. Comfort! You see kids with pacifiers, bottles, lovies out in public? Well, Stinx nurses for comfort in the privacy of our home.
3. Nap time. Stinx nurses before his nap if we're at home. It has made my life soooo much simpler since he started to nurse to sleep at nap time. SO MUCH SIMPLER. I was such a stress case before. I don't think I no longer deserve the title "Nap Nazi".
4. Its great way to cuddle/bond with an really active toddler.
So I don't think weaning will happen anytime soon. And that's OK for now. And its OK that I don't care about what people think of me and my child. Because ya know what? I don't judge the moms at the mall with their 2.5 yr old drinking out of a bottle, or the mom of a toddler with a paci at the play date, or the mom with the toddler at the grocery store with her lovie doll. I don't! Because those are things the child needs for comfort. And it's OK!! IT"S OK!! And so it's OK for my son to nurse in the privacy of my home. And, it's OK for a toddler to nurse in public! It shouldn't be weird to people.
So yeah - Go on Mom's! Do what you need to do! And don't care what other people think. You are just responding to your child's need as best you can. Right?
PS - I also want to add that because I am EBF'ing does not make me a breastfeeding Nazi.. ok?
Nap time surprise.
So I found out that there are a couple people who actually read this blog! See, I thought I was only writing to myself here. Well hello there people!
To update on our interest in adoption, we're just praying about it for now and will see how things go in November at the Foster Parenting info night. We really need to decide if we will be having 2 or 3 kids total.
Stinx and I went swimming with some friends yesterday. It was so much fun! I love that Cardel has cheap swim times for parents with young children. It's about $3.75 for both of us.
Stinx did sleep in until 8:00am yesterday and I thought that after swimming for 1.5 hrs he'd be super tired. We got out of the pool at noon and then had lunch at the tables. He ate so well, eating his whole sandwich. I thought for sure he would fall asleep in the car on the way home. Usually when he does this I am able to transfer him to his crib. However, he didn't fall asleep. "No Problem" I thought. I figured he'd nurse to sleep in a breeze (because he does for most naps). Well, I guess yesterday was just one of those days where God and Stinx like to switch things up on me. He totally didn't nurse to sleep. Finally after awhile I just put him in the crib and bolted. He listened to his musical teddy bear for awhile, whimpered for awhile and then I went to nurse him again but he had fallen asleep. That's probably the first time in months that he hasn't fallen to sleep at nap time without my help.
We used to have this great nap routine. It worked wonders. I would put him in his sleep sack, read some books, sing a song, and then he'd fall asleep in the crib (although I had to stay in the room). But when we moved in April, Stinx seemed to ask to nurse before his naps, and that is how we got into the nurse to sleep nap rut. Which really isn't a rut at all. In fact, nap times have been very pleasant since. I used to stress about them and get really frustrated when he wouldn't fall asleep. So now I quite enjoy putting him down for his nap. Its a nice peaceful time for both of us. Nursing just has that effect.
Now I have to admit that its partly much easier now that he is on one nap. He's just so tired that he falls asleep easily most of the time.
I do think the nurse to sleep for naps has been a blessing for us though. I really didn't want to nurse him before his naps... But that's another thing, I think God wanted me to be flexible to my child. If Stinx wants to nurse to sleep, so be it. And like yesterday, if he doesn't want to nurse to sleep - so be it.
And perhaps Stinx is slowly weaning himself. Which transitions me to the weaning topic.
To update on our interest in adoption, we're just praying about it for now and will see how things go in November at the Foster Parenting info night. We really need to decide if we will be having 2 or 3 kids total.
Stinx and I went swimming with some friends yesterday. It was so much fun! I love that Cardel has cheap swim times for parents with young children. It's about $3.75 for both of us.
Stinx did sleep in until 8:00am yesterday and I thought that after swimming for 1.5 hrs he'd be super tired. We got out of the pool at noon and then had lunch at the tables. He ate so well, eating his whole sandwich. I thought for sure he would fall asleep in the car on the way home. Usually when he does this I am able to transfer him to his crib. However, he didn't fall asleep. "No Problem" I thought. I figured he'd nurse to sleep in a breeze (because he does for most naps). Well, I guess yesterday was just one of those days where God and Stinx like to switch things up on me. He totally didn't nurse to sleep. Finally after awhile I just put him in the crib and bolted. He listened to his musical teddy bear for awhile, whimpered for awhile and then I went to nurse him again but he had fallen asleep. That's probably the first time in months that he hasn't fallen to sleep at nap time without my help.
We used to have this great nap routine. It worked wonders. I would put him in his sleep sack, read some books, sing a song, and then he'd fall asleep in the crib (although I had to stay in the room). But when we moved in April, Stinx seemed to ask to nurse before his naps, and that is how we got into the nurse to sleep nap rut. Which really isn't a rut at all. In fact, nap times have been very pleasant since. I used to stress about them and get really frustrated when he wouldn't fall asleep. So now I quite enjoy putting him down for his nap. Its a nice peaceful time for both of us. Nursing just has that effect.
Now I have to admit that its partly much easier now that he is on one nap. He's just so tired that he falls asleep easily most of the time.
I do think the nurse to sleep for naps has been a blessing for us though. I really didn't want to nurse him before his naps... But that's another thing, I think God wanted me to be flexible to my child. If Stinx wants to nurse to sleep, so be it. And like yesterday, if he doesn't want to nurse to sleep - so be it.
And perhaps Stinx is slowly weaning himself. Which transitions me to the weaning topic.
Thursday, October 2, 2008
Lots to Think About
Last night I went to the Child & Family Services adoption info session. I was really hoping they would talk about Fostering To Adopt. However, that wasn't discussed. They talked about the government adoptions, the kids needing families, pro's and con's etc. One great thing about adopting through them is that all the fees are covered. The adoption itself is pretty much free (minus a few fee's like police records checks etc), then they pay monthly fees that are the same for foster parenting until your child is 18 months. Then they cover some costs for counseling, on top of free counselling through Calgary Family Services. Almost all the kids are considered special needs but that could include a child with glasses, or a sibling group. Of course there are serious issues too such as FAS or attachment disorders. They said last night that most of the kids are 6-12, though sometimes they have 3 years and up.
I think I'd like Stinx to be the oldest child so that puts a damper on things, for at least a few years. I am thinking fostering to adopt would be better. That way I would have a chance with a younger child, and would hopefully be the only foster parent.
There is a foster info night next monday but Myk is out of town. I think I will have to wait until Novembers session. That gives me more time to think about all this though.
The other option of course is for a biological child. I think we'd start trying to concieve around december.
Speaking of pregnancies! This morning Stinx and I went to a playdate with most of the babies from our prenatal class. We get together every once in awhile. I think it had been about 4-5 months since we all got together. It was great seeing all the moms and toddlers. Except... That I was the only one not pregnant, and not trying to concieve. Most of the moms are like 4 months pregnant or more! Wow, these woman get down to business! I am just not ready to jump on that ship yet. I think I'd like Stinx to be a minimum of 2.5 years old.
So much to think about...
On a funny note - Stinx was exploring the new environment at our friends house. I was wondering where he was when I hadn't seen him for a few minutes. I started to worry a bit. I got up to look around the corner where he had been playing. He wasn't there. I then worried that he might have wandered upstairs. but just as i was entertaining that thought, I heard the muffled cry of my child. I panicked, thinking he had been stuck somewhere for ages. I realized the sound was closer to the living room where we had been sitting. Turns out Stinx had opened the kitchen pantry and shut the door on himself. He must have been content for awhile because the pantry was close to where we were. He must have started crying when he heard me calling him.
Poor lil Stinx. So courious.. and loves doors way to much!
On another note - Stinx is saying about 20 words now! yay!
I think I'd like Stinx to be the oldest child so that puts a damper on things, for at least a few years. I am thinking fostering to adopt would be better. That way I would have a chance with a younger child, and would hopefully be the only foster parent.
There is a foster info night next monday but Myk is out of town. I think I will have to wait until Novembers session. That gives me more time to think about all this though.
The other option of course is for a biological child. I think we'd start trying to concieve around december.
Speaking of pregnancies! This morning Stinx and I went to a playdate with most of the babies from our prenatal class. We get together every once in awhile. I think it had been about 4-5 months since we all got together. It was great seeing all the moms and toddlers. Except... That I was the only one not pregnant, and not trying to concieve. Most of the moms are like 4 months pregnant or more! Wow, these woman get down to business! I am just not ready to jump on that ship yet. I think I'd like Stinx to be a minimum of 2.5 years old.
So much to think about...
On a funny note - Stinx was exploring the new environment at our friends house. I was wondering where he was when I hadn't seen him for a few minutes. I started to worry a bit. I got up to look around the corner where he had been playing. He wasn't there. I then worried that he might have wandered upstairs. but just as i was entertaining that thought, I heard the muffled cry of my child. I panicked, thinking he had been stuck somewhere for ages. I realized the sound was closer to the living room where we had been sitting. Turns out Stinx had opened the kitchen pantry and shut the door on himself. He must have been content for awhile because the pantry was close to where we were. He must have started crying when he heard me calling him.
Poor lil Stinx. So courious.. and loves doors way to much!
On another note - Stinx is saying about 20 words now! yay!
Monday, September 29, 2008
Sliding
Ok, so my blogging is pathetic. I really wish I could find the time to post something everyday. I'd like to use the excuse that I am not wasting time on the net as much as I used to. And, it is a true excuse.
Yesterday Stinx and I went to Banff with some of my friends that I have known for literally decades. It was a pretty good trip. I was anxious about it since we even started talking about it. The idea of going somewhere with Stinx for a whole day was a little nerve wracking. Reason being: nap time. I was pretty sure Stinx wouldn't nap somewhere other than his crib.
And...
I was right. I tried as hard as I could to get him to sleep at my friends place. I brought his sleepsack, his lovie (a taggie blanket), dimmed the lights, turned a fan on (I did forget the noise machine!) and used my greatest nap producer, the breast. None of which worked. After nursing for 20 some minutes, he was wide awake. Darn!
By 4pm my friends thought we should all go for a walk. I didn't bring a stroller and purposely brought my Toddlerhawk in case Stinx refused to nap. 10 minutes into our walk, Stinx was out like a light. He napped for 40 minutes, give or take.
It was nice though to get out of town and visit with friends I hadn't seen in a very long time.
Other than that, not much has happened, oh wait...
I did go to an Adoption Info night last week. That was super interesting. It was with an agency called Christian Adoptions. It was really informative and lots of my questions were answered. Myk and I are considering adopting... There is a Info Night with Child and Family Services this wednesday and I am hoping we will learn more about Fostering To Adopt.
But nothing has been decided. I am still taking prenatal vitamins :)
Yesterday Stinx and I went to Banff with some of my friends that I have known for literally decades. It was a pretty good trip. I was anxious about it since we even started talking about it. The idea of going somewhere with Stinx for a whole day was a little nerve wracking. Reason being: nap time. I was pretty sure Stinx wouldn't nap somewhere other than his crib.
And...
I was right. I tried as hard as I could to get him to sleep at my friends place. I brought his sleepsack, his lovie (a taggie blanket), dimmed the lights, turned a fan on (I did forget the noise machine!) and used my greatest nap producer, the breast. None of which worked. After nursing for 20 some minutes, he was wide awake. Darn!
By 4pm my friends thought we should all go for a walk. I didn't bring a stroller and purposely brought my Toddlerhawk in case Stinx refused to nap. 10 minutes into our walk, Stinx was out like a light. He napped for 40 minutes, give or take.
It was nice though to get out of town and visit with friends I hadn't seen in a very long time.
Other than that, not much has happened, oh wait...
I did go to an Adoption Info night last week. That was super interesting. It was with an agency called Christian Adoptions. It was really informative and lots of my questions were answered. Myk and I are considering adopting... There is a Info Night with Child and Family Services this wednesday and I am hoping we will learn more about Fostering To Adopt.
But nothing has been decided. I am still taking prenatal vitamins :)
Sunday, September 21, 2008
Wasp Attack!
It seems my blogging is slowly dying off. I won't let it though! I promise.
Yesterday Grandma and I took Stinx to the new park. It's a lovely park made for toddlers. While Stinx was on the swing a wasp was buzzing around his neck. I tried to get it away from him but the next thing I knew, the wasp was almost down his shirt. I moved his shirt but the wasp was sitting on Stinx' chest bone. It stung him.
But Stinx was tough. He didn't cry. He just started fussing and tried rubbing the area. Poor guy. I was so pissed at the wasp.
On another note, I bought this play kitchen for Stinx. I thought it was such a good deal for $20. The night I bought it I cleaned it up. However, a few days later I noticed the smell of cat piss in our basement. Oh no!!!!!!! The toy reaks like cat pee. Ugh. I have to get rid of it now. Boo.
Yesterday Grandma and I took Stinx to the new park. It's a lovely park made for toddlers. While Stinx was on the swing a wasp was buzzing around his neck. I tried to get it away from him but the next thing I knew, the wasp was almost down his shirt. I moved his shirt but the wasp was sitting on Stinx' chest bone. It stung him.
But Stinx was tough. He didn't cry. He just started fussing and tried rubbing the area. Poor guy. I was so pissed at the wasp.
On another note, I bought this play kitchen for Stinx. I thought it was such a good deal for $20. The night I bought it I cleaned it up. However, a few days later I noticed the smell of cat piss in our basement. Oh no!!!!!!! The toy reaks like cat pee. Ugh. I have to get rid of it now. Boo.
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Mom & Tot's Drop Out
Yep. That's me. The Mom & Tot's Drop Out.
Let me explain.
There is a church in my neighborhood and when we drove by on the week end, I noticed that the sign said, "Mom & Tot's - Starts Wed Sept 17 - 10:30-11:30am". I thought it'd be great to go. I figured since its in the neighborhood it would be a great way to meet more mom's in my community.
So Stinx and I went shopping this morning and then headed to the church for 10:30am. The moment we walked into the church I saw a couple of toddlers. One was crying, "I can't find my mommy!'. Hmmm.. I thought, that's no good. There were kids playing in a room very close to the front doors. I thought it was weird that there were no adults around (that I could see). I kept walking down the foyer and found a room with Moms and some babies. A woman approached me and invited me in. She explained that this is where the Mom's would be - doing "Mom Stuff". There was a table on the right with some papers on it. There was a nursery form, a Fall time table, some stuff on PPD etc. The lady introduced me to one of the mom's who was running the group. I sat down in the circle of chairs and waited for this shin dig to start. Finally a bit later 4 woman came in and introduced themselves. They were the child care volunteers. They'd be taking the 18 months + kids to the room I had seen by the front door, and the other 2 were taking newborn -18 months kids to the nursery room. They then asked to take the kids or bring them to the location. I was really not 100% comfortable with this.
I, thought, that this was going to be one of those Mom's Groups where you can play and hang out with your kids whilst talking to other Mom's. I didn't realize it was a "ditch your baby" party. I hesitated a bit but thought I should give it a go. I brought Stinx into the nursery and he immediately saw all the lovely toys. I made it clear to the volunteers that if he was crying to come get me. They said no problem and explained they would bring him to me because they don't let the babies get worked up. I thought that was good.
I went back to the "Mom" room. I sat at a table and filled out the nursery form. Hmmm. I was not sure I really wanted to give them any information. Secondly, I didn't want to sign anything because I didn't know these people from a whole in the wall. Especially since I don't know their requirements for volunteers. How am I supposed to know if they've had criminal record checks? This is standard stuff! Also, I didn't really want to fill this all out if I wasn't going to be coming regularly. I read the fall schedule and realized that they had specific topics the Moms were to talk about. Apparently next week's topic was "How to organize your kitchen". Maybe that's when I realized that this wasn't going to work. I sat at the table and listened to all the mom's chatting away (in the circle of chairs). Everyone seemed to know each other from the church. I started debating...
Do I stay? Or do I go?
Over and over... Hmm. I couldn't decide... Should I stick it out for the first meeting? Maybe I could make some new friends that live nearby. Hmmm.. Pondering.. Pondering.
"Ah, screw it. This isn't for me."
I folded the papers and put them in my diaper bag. I stood up, left the room, and went straight to the nursery. No one said anything, heck, maybe they didn't notice. I opened the door to the nursery and found Stinx playing very well with the other kids. I almost felt bad taking him out of there. I didn't say anything except "OK buddy, lets go". As I was walking down the hall I saw a Mom in the "Moms room" staring at me. I think she was thinking, "Why is she leaving? What the heck, weirdo". I just flippantly waved her good bye. And off we went.
I guess I am weird. But something just didn't seem right to me. Not that there was anything wrong with them - it just wasn't what I was hoping and expecting it to be. I was hoping to find a room full of Mom's and kids playing and chatting, all together. I really don't have an interest in sitting around talking about how to organize my kitchen and budgeting with complete strangers while my child is off in a nursery. No Thanks.
I have to mention that I am in a great Mom's Group at my own church. It meets every 2ND Wednesday. That's partly why I didn't want to sign any forms because I wasn't planning to do every week, which I think they would have preferred. Anyways... The Mom's Group I am in, is awesome and I really like it, but it's only bi-weekly. I know that with winter coming I will want to get out more often, so I am looking for a couple other groups to join. I was apart of 2 last year but they have dwindled away. Perhaps I should start my own?
Let me explain.
There is a church in my neighborhood and when we drove by on the week end, I noticed that the sign said, "Mom & Tot's - Starts Wed Sept 17 - 10:30-11:30am". I thought it'd be great to go. I figured since its in the neighborhood it would be a great way to meet more mom's in my community.
So Stinx and I went shopping this morning and then headed to the church for 10:30am. The moment we walked into the church I saw a couple of toddlers. One was crying, "I can't find my mommy!'. Hmmm.. I thought, that's no good. There were kids playing in a room very close to the front doors. I thought it was weird that there were no adults around (that I could see). I kept walking down the foyer and found a room with Moms and some babies. A woman approached me and invited me in. She explained that this is where the Mom's would be - doing "Mom Stuff". There was a table on the right with some papers on it. There was a nursery form, a Fall time table, some stuff on PPD etc. The lady introduced me to one of the mom's who was running the group. I sat down in the circle of chairs and waited for this shin dig to start. Finally a bit later 4 woman came in and introduced themselves. They were the child care volunteers. They'd be taking the 18 months + kids to the room I had seen by the front door, and the other 2 were taking newborn -18 months kids to the nursery room. They then asked to take the kids or bring them to the location. I was really not 100% comfortable with this.
I, thought, that this was going to be one of those Mom's Groups where you can play and hang out with your kids whilst talking to other Mom's. I didn't realize it was a "ditch your baby" party. I hesitated a bit but thought I should give it a go. I brought Stinx into the nursery and he immediately saw all the lovely toys. I made it clear to the volunteers that if he was crying to come get me. They said no problem and explained they would bring him to me because they don't let the babies get worked up. I thought that was good.
I went back to the "Mom" room. I sat at a table and filled out the nursery form. Hmmm. I was not sure I really wanted to give them any information. Secondly, I didn't want to sign anything because I didn't know these people from a whole in the wall. Especially since I don't know their requirements for volunteers. How am I supposed to know if they've had criminal record checks? This is standard stuff! Also, I didn't really want to fill this all out if I wasn't going to be coming regularly. I read the fall schedule and realized that they had specific topics the Moms were to talk about. Apparently next week's topic was "How to organize your kitchen". Maybe that's when I realized that this wasn't going to work. I sat at the table and listened to all the mom's chatting away (in the circle of chairs). Everyone seemed to know each other from the church. I started debating...
Do I stay? Or do I go?
Over and over... Hmm. I couldn't decide... Should I stick it out for the first meeting? Maybe I could make some new friends that live nearby. Hmmm.. Pondering.. Pondering.
"Ah, screw it. This isn't for me."
I folded the papers and put them in my diaper bag. I stood up, left the room, and went straight to the nursery. No one said anything, heck, maybe they didn't notice. I opened the door to the nursery and found Stinx playing very well with the other kids. I almost felt bad taking him out of there. I didn't say anything except "OK buddy, lets go". As I was walking down the hall I saw a Mom in the "Moms room" staring at me. I think she was thinking, "Why is she leaving? What the heck, weirdo". I just flippantly waved her good bye. And off we went.
I guess I am weird. But something just didn't seem right to me. Not that there was anything wrong with them - it just wasn't what I was hoping and expecting it to be. I was hoping to find a room full of Mom's and kids playing and chatting, all together. I really don't have an interest in sitting around talking about how to organize my kitchen and budgeting with complete strangers while my child is off in a nursery. No Thanks.
I have to mention that I am in a great Mom's Group at my own church. It meets every 2ND Wednesday. That's partly why I didn't want to sign any forms because I wasn't planning to do every week, which I think they would have preferred. Anyways... The Mom's Group I am in, is awesome and I really like it, but it's only bi-weekly. I know that with winter coming I will want to get out more often, so I am looking for a couple other groups to join. I was apart of 2 last year but they have dwindled away. Perhaps I should start my own?
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